15. When parents say thank-you.

This we believe (NMSA, 2010).

*The school actively involves families in the education of their children. Family Involvement

We are testing this week. I monitor my students as they navigate technology and as they analyze excerpts from stories, poetry, history, and mathematical problems. Once they finish, I hand them a book of their choosing as they wait patiently for their classmates. After testing, they play Uno together, draw pictures on the board, or paint. It is a peaceful, cohesive moment as we wait for the entire school to reach the end of the exams.

This morning, we received an email from an elementary teacher whose daughter is graduating. She wrote the open letter to all teachers, perhaps to remind us of how precious children are to their parents. I asked her if I could post it here. It is the kind of letter I wish every parent could write. It reminds me that we should all carry the torch to help our students find their moment, their passions, their dreams.

As we enter into the last days of our daughter, Anna's, school career as a student of McDowell County Schools, Lamar and I wanted to take a moment and thank you all for the impact you have had in Anna's education and in the lives of our family.  

Old Fort Elementary, you took this five-year-old baby...who threw up every day the first week of school...and you nurtured her and held her and loved her until she felt comfortable enough to be there...you held her and loved her through the death of both of my parents..her grandparents...allowing her the time to grieve...yet still holding her to the highest expectations and not allowing her to stay stuck in her grief.  You differentiated for this kid who had unbelievable math skills...yet, HATED reading...and you told her that was ok...and you challenged her to be the best in everything she did...You gave her roots and made her proud of the place she calls home...you gave her opportunities to build her leadership skills and encouraged her to find her niche.  And we  celebrated with tears of pride and gratitude with her as she returned "home" yesterday...thank you for the  foundation you laid for her.  You were the building blocks that held her education steadfast and everything else was built on.  We will forever be grateful for all that you did for Anna and also for us.

To the faculty and staff at West McDowell "junior high" Middle school...it seems not too long ago that we brought Anna to open house...made her run through her schedule about five times, so that she wouldn't get lost on the first day of school...and reassured her that there was no elevator or swimming pool...that people sent hopelessly lost  seventh graders in search of ...only to find that there was indeed an elevator...we celebrated with her as she made the volleyball team, then the basketball team, and finally the softball team...and then began helping her to learn to balance her schedule to accommodate practice times and balance that with continuing to make good grades...you helped us navigate her teenage years and walked through the times where she was so unsure of herself making us unsure of ourselves as well.  You introduced her to band, to FCA, and other clubs that began to fit her personality. In addition to all the academic areas you exposed her to, you helped her to see that you were there to support her as she tried to live out her faith among her friends.  In awarding her the Patterson award in the ninth grade, you validated for Anna that people do see the things you do when you think no one is watching. It was at West that she accepted God's call to teach.  Thank you for that.

And finally, to the faculty and staff at McDowell High School...wow...here we are...about to embark on another leg of Anna's journey. As an elementary teacher, it is unfathomable to me how you deal daily with all of the needs of all of your students. Yet you do it with grace and commitment, and I thank you for that.  It was at MHS that Anna's Christian walk deepened.  She was able to be real and accepted and valued for the person she is, and it meant so much to her.  Whether it was in the classroom, the volleyball court or the softball field, you allowed her to be herself and never felt pressure to be something she wasn't.  Not many high school students can say that.  Her leadership skills continued to be developed and she blossomed into the young lady she is now.  You did that, and we will forever be indebted to you for all you did for Anna.  As she leaves in the fall for Appalachian State University, she will carry the advice you have all given her and she will succeed...because you have prepared her to do so.

So we say thank you for all you have done.  Though your value has no price tag, what you have done for our family is immeasurable.  

--
Beth L. Silver
Second Grade Teacher
Glenwood Elementary School

7., 9., & 15. "Dear Mr. ___, I just wanted you to know that You are your son's hero."

You are your son’s hero

This we believe (NMSA, 2010).

7* Leaders are committed to and knowledgeable about this age group, educational research, and best practices. Committed Leaders

9* Ongoing professional development reflects best educational practices. Professional Development

15* The school actively involves families in the education of their children. Family Involvement

This we believe (NMSA, 2010) identifies sixteen characteristics that exist in exemplary middle schools. This blog addresses the seventh, ninth, and fifteenth characteristics and is part of the section that addresses leadership and organization, as well as, culture and community.

I had to call a parent yesterday. One of my kids was being disruptive (again) during an exam. I asked him to go to our ICU (Intensive Care Unit). He slammed his computer and took off slamming our classroom door on his way out.

Whoa, my students were shocked. One said, “Man, if I did that at home I wouldn't be able to walk.” Others shook their heads. So I called the parent to let him know that his child had had a bad day and may be angry about events that took place in class. (I also put him on Lunch Detention.)

Today, the boy came to class and worked well. He was a different child. At lunch, I called the parent to let him know his son had had a better day. I received the parent's answering machine and shared the following.

“Good afternoon Mr. ____, I wanted to let you know that  ____ had a better day. I also wanted to tell you that in November, I asked my students to share who their heroes were. We put these names on stars. You are your son’s hero. I thought you would want to know, Mr. ___; you are your son’s hero. (I said it twice.). I hope you all have a nice Christmas.”

I wonder how many times parents hear "bad news" from us and never hear how their child is doing? The more we know about our children, the more likely we are to help them. 

Advice

1)   If you have children who display issues related to behavior problems, read as much as you can about it. I am currently reading a book by Diane Montgomery (2015) called Teaching gifted children with special educational needs: Supporting dual and multiple exceptionality. The chapter that has a lot of information is “Social, Emotional, and Behavioral Difficulties.”

2)   Realize that children who misbehave in your classes may be frustrated, may need attention, may have neurological problems. They need someone who will not give up on them.

3)   Realize that parents of children who misbehave are the most aware of challenges their children face. They, too, need to know that you are in support of their children.

4) If you make contact with a parent, be sure and follow up with how they are doing. Parents want to be informed; they need our support. 

15. Bring in the Parents!!!!

15. Open House: Bring in the Parents!!

This We Believe (AMLE, 2010)

·        *Leaders are committed to and knowledgeable about this age group, educational research, and best practices. Committed Leaders

·       * The school environment is inviting, safe, inclusive, and support of all. School Environment

During my early years of teaching I would send home a weekly, handwritten, quarter-sheet of paper with information regarding each child’s tests, homework, and behavior. As technology improved, I was able to print an update for my students every week. Current technology allows parents and students access to every class.  While this system does not relieve us of the need to contact parents, it does enhance communication.

As teachers, we must keep up with communication tools so parents can see how their child is performing. If we wait several weeks to post grades, no one is benefiting from the tool. However, we must also be aware that not all parents have internet access at home. At the three-week mark, I print out every child’s grades and send them home. At midterm, our team prints out a midterm report card of their overall performance; the report must be signed. At the end of the grading period, our school invites parents to come to school the day before report cards are sent home as an additional layer of communication. Parents can pick up report cards and talk to each of their child’s teachers.

This week we had Open House from 3:30 – 6:30 on Thursday. About one-fourth of our parents attended. Parents first wanted to know how their child was doing; they also wanted to know how their child was behaving; finally, parents wanted to know how to help. Parents were able to bring younger siblings, and in most cases, the student came, too. The meetings were positive and upbeat, and students who had challenges participated in a united front of support and encouragement.

I was able to share student performance data in the classroom, as well as data from a district-wide Benchmark Test given in August. This information gave parents comparative data, and the time together gave each of us insight into the needs of each child as we shed light on their strengths and challenges.

The take-away from this night reinforced my view that parents need more information. The more we can share with parents, the more likely children will be successful. Parents want to know how often you give homework, and when assignments are due. Parents want us to know how they are handling behavior and responsibility at home. (We heard quite a few parents who have removed phone and technology from their child’s world.) Parents and teachers need to be on the same page. This activity was a great way to reinforce the experience.

Advice

1)   Make your grading system simple. If possible, collaborate with your colleagues. Each member of the team should be aware of how the other grades. If possible, spread out your quizzes and assignments so children are not overwhelmed with due dates. The more consistency that exists on a team, the easier it will be for parents to support your efforts.

2)   Keep a record of parents you contact. When you contact a parent, take the time to follow up the next week to report how the student is doing. I have heard of teachers who make it a point to contact every parent within the first six weeks of school.

3)   I highly recommend contacting parents of students who are doing well. Parents do not receive enough encouragement and appreciation. It is a small gesture to call and let a parent know that ______ is doing well in class and that you appreciate their work as parents as well as the work of their child.                              

4)   Parents cannot help their children if they do not know what is happening in school! If we wait until the last minute to post grades or let parents know about problems, they may not be able to help. As you begin thinking about the structures of your grading system, consider how often you will communicate with parents.

15 & 16. Ya HaHa Ha Ha: Haunted Hallways: Parent and Community Involvement

This We Believe (NMSA, 2010).

·         *  The school involves families in the education of their children. Family Involvement

·         *  The school involves families and business partners. Community & Business

      This we believe (NMSA, 2010) provides sixteen characteristics associated with exemplary middle schools. This blog addresses characteristics fifteen and sixteen and is under the section that addresses culture and community.

On October 30-31, our PTA orchestrated a “Haunted Hallways” fundraiser. A small army of parents created creepy scenarios for community members to bring their families in for a frightful night of screams and eerie music. Teachers were told to choose Friday or Saturday night to participate as guides, zombies, creepy (Have I said that already?) beasts to worry and frighten guests. Parents and about ten students  participated.

So, reluctant teachers, enthusiastic teachers, and willing teachers (about 85% of the faculty) volunteered. We arrived early so that the local cosmetology school volunteers could paint us with makeup. In addition, there were masks and costumes, gory parts, props, and other gross things to enliven the night. Standing in line to be “dressed” was interesting. Those who were hesitant but willing watched as their teammates emerged as frightening creatures. And as we dressed and were adorned, it was as if we transformed from teachers to creepies. (Yah aha ha ha haha!)

I was a guide. In my gargoyle attire, carrying a creepy doll, with a hollow mask I stepped outside where children awaited. I felt very scary. One of my students looked over and said, “Hi Mrs. Ruppert.”  (So much for creepy. It must have been the Nike tennis shoes.) However, at one point, inside the hall, I had to take my mask off so a young child would stop screaming. (Okay, I only actually frightened two people all  night, and they were small children.)

We had “lights on” for the first hour to allow small children not to be too frightened; then the lights went out…. Faculty would jump out of curtains, or drape plastic spiders on people’s shoulders. A fine mist of water accompanied blood curdling screams, which was quite gross. Zombies would follow guests.

Initially, when the lights went out, we had a smoke machine. It was soooo cool! 

Oops. We set the fire alarm off so had to evacuate the building. 

The local fire department came through, inspected everything, and as they were leaving an eerie voice whispered seethingly, “You are welcome to stay. We will take good care of you. Yah haha haHA  AH HAHAHAHA.” They ran out the door! (Well, not really; they walked briskly.) (:

What I found was having the opportunity to work with a group of teachers as monsters, over the course of several hours, gave each of us a refreshing sense of belonging, a time to “play” together, in a setting of care and love for the community we serve.

On Monday, after the Haunted Hallways, the parent leadership team met to discuss the successes. They were pleased with the turnout and the participation of parents, teachers, and students. The next event they are wanting to participate in is a formal dance for the kids. Parents want their children to learn and want them to feel part of the community. Parents are an amazing part of a middle school and must be supported!!!

Advice:

1)   Even though you may think participating in events may seem a little corny; do it anyway. Sharing your time with colleagues goes far towards building team spirit.

2)   Your students want to see you outside the classroom. Ball games, plays, performances, and events allow your students and their parents to see that children in your school matter.

3)   Be sure and take pictures. It all came together when we took a group shot. (I have provided a cropped version above. I didn’t want to include pictures of the students “we dressed.”) Yah haha haha, I am holding the doll. My team mate is sitting next to me with the chainsaw. (:

4) Be sure and thank the parents for the work they do. Pulling off a Haunted event was no easy task. There is a PTA meeting on December 6. We will celebrate with them formally on that day.